my story
I hated myself. Because of where society placed me, the way they talked about me; a loser, ugly, waste of space. And I despised myself for it! I couldn’t change me or the way they thought of me. I could try all I wanted, mold myself into the barbie drone, but I would know. In the back of my head I would hear the truth that no one else could. I would still be the loser. Because I couldn’t become someone better I would become of what they thought of me, a no one. I would sink into the nothingness, drown in it. I became to know only late nights and school became pointless. I dropped out. I made new friends, not that I had any in the first place. Crystal, Sid, and Lady K. We became the best of friends, we hung out constantly. They changed me, and I needed them. Mondays blurred to Tuesdays, Tuesdays to Wednesday. Eventually everyday seemed like a Friday night. I never cried, my new friends made me feel warm and cozy. I was never without them. I was a kite, always flying high. Until I crashed. Crashed so fast that I didn’t have time to see the view as I fell. The uniforms hoisted me off the ground and the flashing lights took me away.
I am awake in strange place, alone. My friends no where near. Someone enters the room. They are speaking to me. I do not understand. The words doctor, death, overdose, heart beat, dance around my ears. They mean nothing. “I WANT MY FRIENDS” I scream. I am strapped to the bed and I can’t move. I want loose. “Let me go” I shout. “ Let me go, let me go. Just let me die” The figure just stares. The sound barely escapes my lips, but I can hear it.“I’m already gone” I whisper. The figure turns and leaves, because they know that I am right. I am left alone. With my words loud and clear in my head. A tear slides dowm my face. I’m alreay gone.