Scratch Online

I’m sorry William
but my heart only leaps up
when I notice my cell phone
vibrating.

to a place where ideas come to me from everything I see from everything I hear from everything I touch everything I say I taste I smell where those ideas transform into something plausible something visible something incredible. Take me to a place where creativity wraps it’s long strong stringy fingers around my mind through my mind and promises to never let go to never leave me lonely and deprived of curiosity. Take me to a place where reality warps and twists and molds together with dreams and goals and designs where it gets a little too hard to decipher…

he sat there in the dark on my couch ready to let me walk away ready to watch me go but I already had my actions planned out this time I had the perfect words ready to follow a perfect action. I leaned down cupped my hands around his face our noses touched he chuckled like a nervous child. I pressed my lips to his soft gentle. He would have never guessed how badly I wanted to climb on top of him how badly I wanted him right there. It’s always been him. I pulled my lips from his and…

I’ve felt the feelings that cause the look the one you make when you want to tell someone important maybe even a little intimidating something something bigger than your mouth can hold something bigger than your mind can grasp something that is toxic if you keep it in you any longer if you keep it waiting behind clenched teeth tight as prison bars any more but beautiful and exciting if you let it out if you let it free into our world to be heard by the person meant to hear it let it free to take you where it…

to the washroom she was in the last stall again Unlock it. “Crawl under.” I couldn’t stand it anymore I couldn’t pity her anymore Unlock the door, Gatty. I heard the lock slide pushed the door open. There she was. Sitting on the floor bare scarred arm exposed and ready. She fumbled with a small pencil a sharpener trying to pick off the blade with her bloody fingers. I just stood there getting more and more angry. She got it. Oh, for fuck sakes I stomped toward her snatched the razor out of her hand That’s enough! You don’t need…

that would usually be forgotten and pushed aside if they were never taken. Death is so unrealistic when it directly affects you your life and the people in your life. It’s weird that pictures that anything having to do with the deceased can exist after they die. What if when a person died they took along everything they would have left behind with them? What if all they left behind was you and your memories? No pictures or postcards no pieces of writing or presents NOTHING that could ever remind you that they were once alive and breathing and here…

Right now I’m peaceful yet my mind never rests and it is always at risk. Right now I’m thinking I’m always thinking I like to let my mind wonder I like to see where it takes me. Sometimes it takes me to that damn boy sometimes to my mother my father my sister my dog. Right now it has taken me to the pilot in the plane above me noisily moving from one end of the sky to the next. I’m thinking about what would happen if that plane stopped working and started plummeting to the earth and made contact…

We’re all frogs. Here we sit in a pot of water that has been gradually boiling this whole time but we won’t jump out or do anything about it because we simply don’t notice what is happening. Outsiders looking in on us watch us slowly boil to death and they wonder what is wrong with us. They probably laugh at us too. ‘Stupid little humans, can’t recognize danger if they were to sit right in the middle of it.’ And so we sit. And sit. And sit. Until only we are at fault for our slow but certain demise.

We all judge the people we see and meet based on their image and their characteristics. The way they look matters, the way they talk, and walk. The way they deal with people and stresses and problems. We judge them based solely on what see and hear with our eyes and ears. But what we often forget is that what we are judging is what those people choose to show us. What we see and hear is almost never the full or even part of the truth as too who these people really are. So, what if for just one…

One mistep one slip of my foot one little mistake and I fall down the steep rocky edge to my sure and sudden death leaving behind my mangled twisted broken and bruised body on the road below. What does it mean when even that repetitive thought doesn’t stop me? Maybe it even encourages me a little bit because it feels good because it feels like something interesting could actually happen. I dangle my feet from the precipice urging it to crumble from beneath me and I play out different scenarios in my head over and over. The wind dances with…